Monday, October 13, 2008

Watch ya back might be next

I bet a lot of you think I'm talking about an imaginary character from Philly who was a boxer that went waaay past his prime...even for Hollywood and overcame tremendous odds to beat the champ and then himself become champ. Well,I don't mind telling you that you're wrong.
No my friends I am talking about a flying squirrel who used to have a best friend by the name of Bullwinkle until Bullwinkle was tragically taken from us in a fly by.
Yes ladies and gentlemen,Sarah "The Closet Freak,Key swappin',Moose Killa" Palin, purposely shot and killed Bullwinkle.
Apparently part of the giant vortex of knowledge that she possesses (ppffftt..I can't even type that without laughing...and then cringing a little) does not include cartoon icons.
There are some reports, mainly on the internets, that when she was told that she was about to shoot the only talking moose alive;Bullwinkle,she winked a couple of times,stroked her shotgun barrel as if it were male genitalia and said;"Darn tootin!" She then turned to lean out the side of the helicopter and blasted the beloved American icon right between his majestic antlers.
This my friends is terrible news and I would hate to be the person to have to tell Rocky...maybe Boris can do it,if they let him into the country for the funeral. No doubt a closed casket ceremony as the body will have been dismembered and eaten or mounted on a wall somewhere,probably her wall once someone tells her who he was.
What's next? I mean are Yogi and Boo-boo on her hit list too,Daffy,Pluto....gasp...Tweety!? Will she kill all our beloved cartoon animals!
It's quite obvious to anyone watching the situation that she has some sort of vendetta against moose and wolves and polar bears and women and black people and gays. Maybe that urban legend is know the one about the little girl who's family was attacked and killed by a wild pack of moose,wolves,polar bears,women,blacks and gays. Yeah,they left her for dead and she grew up and grew strong in the forest vowing revenge against those who killed her family. I think she is drunk with power nor will she stop until she is ruling the land with an iron of nine tails,bustier,thigh-high boots and feathered handcuffs. Okay so that's a little fantastical but that is the vibe I get from her,there is a secret that she is holding on to about her past or her real wishes for the future that scare me and the fact that she is so readily able to kill animals scares me,whether for food or otherwise...and I don't mean scared like a husband is "scared" of his wife,I mean scared like hello she is the governor of a state in America, she is the focus of the national media and she couldn't identify a newpaper that she reads or has read!
I'll tell you what,if I were Mcain I would not go quail hunting with her. She's got a shotgun and she knows how to use it...just ask moose and squirrel.....oh wait she killed the moose and I'd watch my back if I was the squirrel.
I'll tell you what else too,the people who she panders to,are the first ones to start a fight and throw a punch,they live for conflict and the shedding of blood,they are the ones who want us to keep the killing going so that the body count keeps rising because anyone who is different from "us" is a target just like poor Bullwinkle and that is YIH8Uuu.

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