Sunday, June 13, 2010

Slick, oil. Slick.

First of all I know what you're thinking...two days in a row? He wrote a joint two days in a row? The end of the world is nigh!!! Repent all ye sinners!!! Hell hath frozen over.
Naaah it ain't that serious, I just wanted to write today, is that so wrong. Smart asses!

So I will get write to it (didja see what I did there?) There is a huge leak in the Gulf and it's not leaking water, it's leaking oil. Thousands of gallons of oil by the minute. I'm sure you've seen the pictures and heard officials from the company responsible talking about how sorry they are etc. Here's the thing though, all that isn't stopping the oil from coming out and apparently there isn't anything that seems to be helping and they've tried many things. What they didn't try was not drilling without a plan!!! How come when we were growing up we were always told to be prepared for the about just being prepared! Remember that? I certainly do. How about just plain old common sense? Oh I forgot common sense is an endangered species in the world and it's dying at an alarming rate.
Case in point, all the folks who were trying to turn this disaster into a political issue. Using this as a way to question the president's actions, rather than place the blame where it actually lays. The blame should be placed on the culture of greed that has grown in this country over the last two decades, the culture of decadence and gluttony that has been so pervasive even encouraged. As a nation we've shown the rest of the world how to consume more, take more than our fair share and not give in equal abundance. And unfortunately many nations have followed the model and look what has happened. The entire world was on the brink of insolvency (that means broke, the whole world is broke) I won't even begin to discuss why this is the case but let's just say that the world banks are ripping governments off by charging ridiculous interest on every single dollar that is made.
So now we face the biggest ecological disaster the planet has faced since we came crawling out of the mud, since the dinosaurs became extinct and became the oil that we are so addicted to in the first place...irony? Nation of millions? Your table is ready. It's gotten so bad that Hollywood directors are being asked for their advice, the problem must be epic! (That was probably way over your heads but I got it) Because if we're involving people who specialize in creating imaginary disaster scenarios and the solutions for them then we must be fucked.

Still the oil leaks out at a horrifying rate. I bet if there were profits to be made in fixing the problem there'd be a solution. I bet if Halliburton could make a buck they'd be on this like stank on shit. But that's part of the issue as well because let's face it, the earth is the last thing these corporate muhfukkas care about, as a matter of fact if they could destroy the earth entirely and sell it to us they's the worse part I bet you'd buy it's got extra cheese and 750 horse power!
Okay here comes the conspiracy part that you've gotten accustomed to, the destruction of earth is part of the plan. But that is a totally different piece to write about. But don't say I didn't warn you.
How could something like this happen? Again I go back to that whole preparation idea. How is it allowed to drill so far down with out some contingency plan should a leak occur. Shouldn't someone go to jail behind this major fuck up? I mean isn't that criminal negligence?! I mean I got fired just for talking about a manager who may or may not be a lesbian. This may completely destroy an entire states economy...again.
Another question is who was supposed to be in charge? Yeah, yeah research, besmirch..that's not my thing, which you should know by now if you've read any of these things...I'm the commentary guy...remember? Okay so I do know that the agency in charge was supposed to be M.M.S. who in the past was involved with bribes, sex parties, bribes with sex parties and receiving gifts of basically sex won over public safety...hmmm go figure. Meanwhile there are still those who say that the company responsible is being treated too harshly by our president because he has made some statements in recent days against the company responsible, only after others have said that he was being too soft on the company responsible...poor guy. He can't get a break in this country. First he's too this, then he's not enough of that, he's too soft, now he's too hard. He apparently can't catch a break but I bet he could if he was the head of an oil company. But alas I digress.

How do I wrap this all up, something really good just came on the telly so I wanna finish this.
Oh I know, I'll leave you with this. We hunted down the evil-doers who attacked us on 9/11 and the facts of that day are still not nearly in the open, the facts of this disaster are in the open...the open water of The Gulf, destroying the livelihoods of several hundred businesses and lives. Destroying an already fragile ecological system quite possibly forever. What are we going to demand be done about this?
Get ready for a new type of Cajun shrimp covered in oil and spices...just slides down easy.
A veritable cornucopia of new dishes will come out of this mess, so perhaps it is a blessing in disguise...disguised in thick black gunk (but don't we fear anything black in this country?)
This is the lifeblood of a pusher feeding our addiction and yet we will keep buying it, knowing it is killing us.
Our future is dependent upon how we react to this and so far the reaction is just feigned anger, just wait until buyer's remorse starts to set in..that's when the real action begins when really, the now is what is important. But I'm probably just talking to dead wildlife. You know what's coming next right...yeah...this is YIh8uuu.

Saturday, June 12, 2010

I don't discriminate

I hate to be a sourpuss but as usual I was given a reason to be mad.
Why are there so many oblivious people in the world and how come they always seem to gravitate to me?
I had to venture into Babylon today to get cat food. I thought that if I left early enough I could avoid the daft and mindless droves of people who walk in one direction while looking in another, no such luck as there was the farmers market going on right in the direct path of where I needed to go...yaaaaay! Now at the risk of sounding like a douchey racist scuzzbag I have to say that the majority of these mindless twits are white folks. But I guess that their sense of entitlement won't just disappear, I mean it's existed since...well since forever. Even white folks I'm sure will agree that this sense that everything and everyone has to cow-tow to and move around them is annoying. I've spoken about this before and excuse me for seeming like "angry black man" but gottdammit I am angry!!
I am angry that you still don't seem to get why I am angry. I am angry that many of you, with your tight fitting skinny legged jeans, ironic tee-shirts, fucked up footwear and lack of hygiene think that your existence is more important than mine. That your space is more valuable than mine, that you moved into a neighborhood that is so "scary" yet you walk down the street with your head down and your noise reduction headphones blaring. You don't make eye contact with anyone and at the same time your pushing by me on the L train.
Well my friends the time has come that I must start slapping the stupid out of folks.
No more whistle blowing, no more writing citations and no more sucking it up and counting to ten. Nay. I shall start physically assaulting you. Of course I won't! Because even though I would have every right to, I would be the one going to jail because let's face it...white makes right. Remember a few years ago the white lady who drowned her two sons and said a black man carjacked her.
I wonder how long they looked for that guy or how many brothers ended up locked up because of the virtuous white lady's word?

It's funny how shocked white folks always get when you actually call them out on their rudeness and stupidity, this appalled look they get on their faces as if to say, how dare you correct me on my social ineptitude. Now I realize that this all sounds like I don't like white not true...ask all of my white friends, ask the white boy who once told me that he was more black than me, ask my white wife from Switzerland or better yet ask all the black women who give us dirty looks when we go out together. Honestly this isn't really a race issue...okay well it sort of is because I believe that in such an economically diverse neighborhood there really ought to be more attempts at togetherness.

But enough about white folks...let's talk about Puerto Ricans because we all will be in about a week and the week leading up to the Puerto Rican day parade, as merengue blaring from souped up chop shop cars goes by at two in the morning making car alarms go off.
As the woman who is too old to be wearing that wears it anyway comes sauntering down the stairs to sit on the stoop and gossip about members of the neighborhood as well as her own friends and family and any woman who walks by...all in a language that we should all learn if we don't know it already. Unfortunately I don't remember nearly as much Spanish as I should but I generally know when I'm being talked about and in this neighborhood they don't even try to mask it.
Yes the P.R. day parade is rapidly approaching and I can't tell you how happy I am to know that I will be out of town. It used to be a source of pride but over the years it has grown into an outrageous display of machismo and misogyny. By the way how many different ways can a flag be turned into a garment to wear...hats, jersey shirts, jersey dresses, shorts, mini-skirts, bandannas, tee-shirts even shoes. Even shirts for the vehicle that is blaring merengue.

So I bet you're waiting for me to talk about black folks right? Well you're in luck.
People can we please stop this incessant need to be cool? Can we get our young men to pull their fucking pants up? Can we get our young women to stop falling for the okey-doke and dropping their pants popping out babies. Can we all stop ending up on Maury fucking Povich? Can we acknowledge that there are other folks around us and that when we are in social settings we should act as if our mothers were with us all the time, act as if we do care how others see us, act as though we were in church, believing in a God that isn't even ours? Can we accept the fact that we can make our lives better if we give a shit about where we live, from the building we occupy to the street we live on. If we care about who our children play with but I bet no one cares, I bet you'd all rather let the daft and oblivious keep getting in your way, I bet you'd rather keep getting exploited and wearing flags as clothes and this is YIh8uuu.