I hate to be a sourpuss but as usual I was given a reason to be mad.
Why are there so many oblivious people in the world and how come they always seem to gravitate to me?
I had to venture into Babylon today to get cat food. I thought that if I left early enough I could avoid the daft and mindless droves of people who walk in one direction while looking in another, no such luck as there was the farmers market going on right in the direct path of where I needed to go...yaaaaay! Now at the risk of sounding like a douchey racist scuzzbag I have to say that the majority of these mindless twits are white folks. But I guess that their sense of entitlement won't just disappear, I mean it's existed since...well since forever. Even white folks I'm sure will agree that this sense that everything and everyone has to cow-tow to and move around them is annoying. I've spoken about this before and excuse me for seeming like "angry black man" but gottdammit I am angry!!
I am angry that you still don't seem to get why I am angry. I am angry that many of you, with your tight fitting skinny legged jeans, ironic tee-shirts, fucked up footwear and lack of hygiene think that your existence is more important than mine. That your space is more valuable than mine, that you moved into a neighborhood that is so "scary" yet you walk down the street with your head down and your noise reduction headphones blaring. You don't make eye contact with anyone and at the same time your pushing by me on the L train.
Well my friends the time has come that I must start slapping the stupid out of folks.
No more whistle blowing, no more writing citations and no more sucking it up and counting to ten. Nay. I shall start physically assaulting you. Of course I won't! Because even though I would have every right to, I would be the one going to jail because let's face it...white makes right. Remember a few years ago the white lady who drowned her two sons and said a black man carjacked her.
I wonder how long they looked for that guy or how many brothers ended up locked up because of the virtuous white lady's word?
It's funny how shocked white folks always get when you actually call them out on their rudeness and stupidity, this appalled look they get on their faces as if to say, how dare you correct me on my social ineptitude. Now I realize that this all sounds like I don't like white folks...so not true...ask all of my white friends, ask the white boy who once told me that he was more black than me, ask my white wife from Switzerland or better yet ask all the black women who give us dirty looks when we go out together. Honestly this isn't really a race issue...okay well it sort of is because I believe that in such an economically diverse neighborhood there really ought to be more attempts at togetherness.
But enough about white folks...let's talk about Puerto Ricans because we all will be in about a week and the week leading up to the Puerto Rican day parade, as merengue blaring from souped up chop shop cars goes by at two in the morning making car alarms go off.
As the woman who is too old to be wearing that wears it anyway comes sauntering down the stairs to sit on the stoop and gossip about members of the neighborhood as well as her own friends and family and any woman who walks by...all in a language that we should all learn if we don't know it already. Unfortunately I don't remember nearly as much Spanish as I should but I generally know when I'm being talked about and in this neighborhood they don't even try to mask it.
Yes the P.R. day parade is rapidly approaching and I can't tell you how happy I am to know that I will be out of town. It used to be a source of pride but over the years it has grown into an outrageous display of machismo and misogyny. By the way how many different ways can a flag be turned into a garment to wear...hats, jersey shirts, jersey dresses, shorts, mini-skirts, bandannas, tee-shirts even shoes. Even shirts for the vehicle that is blaring merengue.
So I bet you're waiting for me to talk about black folks right? Well you're in luck.
People can we please stop this incessant need to be cool? Can we get our young men to pull their fucking pants up? Can we get our young women to stop falling for the okey-doke and dropping their pants popping out babies. Can we all stop ending up on Maury fucking Povich? Can we acknowledge that there are other folks around us and that when we are in social settings we should act as if our mothers were with us all the time, act as if we do care how others see us, act as though we were in church, believing in a God that isn't even ours? Can we accept the fact that we can make our lives better if we give a shit about where we live, from the building we occupy to the street we live on. If we care about who our children play with but I bet no one cares, I bet you'd all rather let the daft and oblivious keep getting in your way, I bet you'd rather keep getting exploited and wearing flags as clothes and this is YIh8uuu.