Monday, October 11, 2010

closeted genius

Hey, hey, hey! What up fools?! Cut to the chase? Will do.
Today I want to make a confession and I guess in some way a vow. The confession is I have always known that I am great. I have not always however worked hard to prove it as well as I could have.
Call it being intellectually lazy. Call it fear. Call it a cop out if you have to but understand I will find you...I kid, I kid. Dissolve into a scene from junior high.
The time when I could have very easily landed on my foot after jump kicking the bubble in the chain linked fence that surrounded the building. I forget who I was actually going to kick, whoever stood on the other side of that bubble but midway through I either changed my mind in my intent to maim this kid or realized how funny it would be to I fell. Genius! I went for the laugh instead of the violence. Wow. Absolute genius. I was always like that I guess. There was a time when, as a kid I would dance out a skit of the song "Another One Bites The Dust" by Queen (I think, I told you I'm not good with that stuff). I had a spin move at the end of which I would jump into the air and land on my poor knees! Brilliant!
When I was a baby I came in second in a beauty a girl! Gorgeous! So it stands to reason that my soon to be born son will have many of these genius and star quality attributes.
And my vow is to make sure he does not take it for granted like I have and yes...still do sometime.
How do I keep my kid from becoming like the rest of these other little future Cee students. Besides the fact that he's already S.A.B. Gee. Which I'm guessing you're trying to figure means what exactly. Well let me tell you, it stands for Super Advanced Baby Genius. Yeah that's right.
Now getting back on track. How do I keep my kid from being like...well, me.
As brilliant and genius as I actually am I have not quite yet reached my potential...quite? Who am I kidding? I'm not even close.
But my son has a chance to reach his full potential. Starting with a brand new clean slate. He has no experience besides swimming and eating...and he ain't really eating on his own power and swimming? He's more floating than backstroking...
so nada.
He can still indeed become the super advanced genius that I know he is.
My time is all but over. Whatever talent I may have had has probably long since faded, withered and blown out the closing window of opportunity.
What can I show him about life that will be the key to making his destiny a reality? What lessons have I learned, that I can relay to him that will be the difference? Will he love me as much as I love him?
My son. Those words mean more to me than any two words have ever meant to anyone anywhere at any time? My son. I vow to protect him with all my power and to shield him from ignorance. I will alert him of it's existence but definitely steer him in the other direction. And I confess my fear that my past transgressions will be revisited by him in his age of discovery.
Many mistakes were made in the making of this man and yes I do indeed have some regrets. I just hope that he can be respected and that he most importantly respects himself, that he is fearless and never believes that he can't. Because he can.
I vow to be there for him when he needs me and when he doesn't I'll just hang out on the sidelines just in case. There are so many things I want to say to him to let him know about the world. So for the rest of our lives I will.
He will let his genius manifest itself and I will help him cultivate and refine that genius. Father and son exposing genius to the world. No longer closeted and never was.

" is I'm not no psycho."

If you know any part of that quote then perhaps you are very, very cool or just in my generation of rap fans. But this one ain't really for you. It is but it isn't. This one is really more for your insanely obnoxious kids. Your less than talented and spoiled princesses. The kids that you never gave anything to but your genes and a few hundred thousand dollars perhaps even millions. The kid that you left on the steps of a neighbor's house. The kid that you traded for some crack. The kid that you threw away or at least left on the top of a pile of garbage. The kids that none of you ever bothered to tell to shut up "when grown folks is talking." The same kid that today kills four people in a drunk driving accident, which is an oxymoron when you think about it because if you get behind the wheel of a car while you are drunk then you have accepted the consequences, before hand. So it is no accident! It is a catastrophe. It means that yet another person made a selfish decision to endanger the lives of his/her fellow citizens of earth. Just because that murderer happens to be an officer shouldn't matter either and if it did then it should mean the punishment is more severe. To go from serve and protect to hurt, maim and murder is the ultimate betrayal.

When a kid in this day and age decides to let his lack of guidance become his/her compass by which they make all decisions then we have a serious problem. When a kid lets his ass be coonstantly exposed from atop his pants (yes I know I spelled con-stant-ly wrong...or did I?) as he waddles down the street because his pants are either tightly belted around his thighs or he is constantly pulling them up as he walks...uh, waddles down the sidewalk. Does this kid not know what this means? Does he understand the origins of this "fashion statement", this, "uniform of the hood" a symbol of, so hood it don't get no hood'er actually means?
Does he know that he is in fact advertising to be some grown man's prison bitch?
Somehow I don't think they understand the true significance of it all, yet when you consider the neighborhoods these particular kids come from, you would think they did know...hey perhaps I have stumbled onto something...hmmm...I will have to pursue that thought at another time...wait, no, I wanna go with this new thought for a moment...what if this were really some sort of code among young black boys and older seasoned ex-cons. What if this is in fact how they connect.  Whoa. Okay, back to topic.
How do we restore your dignity. How do we get you all back on the road to becoming good human beings?
I realize that there are not many examples of what a good human being is but maybe use your own idea and go by that. What sort of responsibility do you want us to accept and I'm sure we will take it on as you wish. Just what are we supposed to do to restore hope for the future, hope in you because you are the future. As it stands now I am quickly succumbing to the malaise of the daft. That is the beginning stage of full on fear and ignorance. What's even more dire is the new notion that shock value equals entertainment.
Ignorance is not bliss. And money is not the answer to all that ails you, especially not mentally and spiritually.
There is a way to better yourself even if you don't think you need bettering...and trust me you do.

Spoiled, rich and entitled doesn't give you everything either. Actually there is more responsibility with all that money that you didn't earn. Driving fast cars that you borrow from your dad doesn't make you cool. In fact you're just a rich nerd. Trying to be cool by pretending that you're one of the other kids from the wrong side of the tracks...I don't know which of you is stupider. Sorry I didn't mean that.
Wait hold on a sec, I just had another idea for a story...sexual predator comes home after a long bid, he probably took his many times while inside. He sees all this tight butted young black tail running around Harlem and begins getting the itch in just a few short weeks. So when he can't take it anymore he gets in his car and drives around the hood, cruising if you will, finds his first victim, snatches him and brutally rapes him. This continues for weeks and then months. Then suddenly the rapes stop. In Harlem. They soon start happening in The Bronx. Same pattern. Then the rapes stop. Until they start happening in Brooklyn. How long before the young men stop wearing their pants like that?
Sorry I had to go there but it was a thought that kept creeping up in the back of my head. It fleshed itself out if you will. Back to you spoiled selfish, scared punk, obnoxious brat rich kid. Yeah they really do exist. They aren't just a reality show. A few of you just thought that it would actually make a good one though, maybe on E! and that is exactly yih8uuu.

keep spreadin that love!